>>5979996"It's the last house on the right, see it? Not the two story one, the one next to it. The kind of um... I don't know, what do you call that... um, green?" You strain your neck from inside the SUV that you, Hank, and Gomez are sitting in to see the house that Hank is referring to.
"Sage," Gomez answers.
"Sage? What, do you work at the fucking pottery barn? Jesus."
"Sage. That's the word for it. My fault the only word your dumbass knows is 'green'?"
"Cheese dick. I know that one, how about that?" Gomez shakes his head. "Anyway, it's the <span class="mu-i">sage</span> one, see it?" You do see it, eventually. It just looks like a normal house to you.
"So, what tells you it's a meth lab?" you ask.
"Just our snitch. Says some dude goes by Cap'n Cook lives up to his name in there. Says he always adds a, a dash of chili powder," Hank chuckles. "Ah, you exuberant Mexicans." One guy? Really?
"Uh-uh," Gomez interjects. "Captain Cook? That's a <span class="mu-i">white</span> boy's name. Dopey as hell too." You guess you could believe it. If you were in a lab with all the ingredients, you could probably make it yourself too. But non-scientists? Wow.
"Yeah?" Hank reaches into his pocket to grab his wallet. "Tell you what, I got you twenty bucks that says he's a beaner." Gomez does the same.
"Alright. You're on." Hank places a twenty dollar bill on the console, and Gomez puts two teners down. You sigh at this exchange. Hank looks impatiently at a school bus driving by. Seems like the bust was scheduled to happen only after the bus passed the house in order not to interrupt its route. Smart. It quickly speeds by. As soon as it does, Hank holds his radio up to his mouth.
"Alright. School bus is clear, you got the green light."
"Copy that," a voice on the radio responds. As Hank starts the car to get closer, a big black van with four DEA officers holding onto it drives right up to the house. Hank follows them.
"Watch this, makes them shit." He scats "Ride of the Valkyries" as you all approach the scene. The officers on the car jump off of it and ready up as soon as it stops, unholstering their guns and standing in formation. You notice they're all wearing masks and respirators.
"Meth labs are nasty on a good day. You mix that shit wrong, and you got mustard gas." Oh yeah, that's right. You remember that fish smell. Actually, mustard gas is sulfur. With the ingredients you'd find in a meth lab, it'd most likely be:
"Phosphine gas," you correct. Hank looks back to you, and you think that you may have overstepped for a second. This is his ride you're along for, after all. Plus, you kinda seem like a <span class="mu-i">criminal</span> for knowing this. At least a criminal <span class="mu-s">nerd</span>. Gotta reel it back. "I think." Hank turns back to the scene.
"Yeah, exactly. One whiff'll kill ya. That's why the respirators." The three of you watch as the officers slowly disappear into the backyard.
