>>49979807Everything about that plan is stupid. So you're just going to be some grim ornament on a tree for someone to find at the start of their shift? Great way of making someones life more miserable Sam. Imagine, unironically, going to work and you see a body hanging from a tree. Yeah, that's not gonna fuck with anybody.
Also, you live with other people; I'm assuming a homeless shelter right? That's why you are talking with us, rather than talking with someone there because you either
A: Feel disgusted by them or B: Don't think they actually care about you.
I mean, if your answer is to borrow money, and seek out the lottery for an answer to life, and the fact you have no cash, that seems like the logical conclusion really. Why don't you just tell one of the people there how you feel? Why don't you let someone inside your mind, someone close? Are you afraid of rejection? (Pro tip, you are) or are you afraid that, for once, you might be actually having an opprotunity with your life, even when the previous ones were slipped out from underneath you? Are you afraid of actually succeeding? Of actually getting somewhere in life? That somehow, if things got better, it makes the sufferings you went through seem meaningless? It won't, those moments of pain of suffering will become trophies, notches on your belt, that you'll be able to look back on and say "Even in my lowest point, I made it. By my own two hands, and all I did was talk to someone sincerely and say "Please, help me."
Also >I want to be high when I die.
See, that's your problem Sam. If you have money for drugs, you have money for other things. If you get drugs to get high, then sell them and use them to escape your situation. You're in a homeless shelter, it should be easy to find someone to sell the drugs to.
Instead of pissing away money in a lottery get rich fantasy, use smart and clever thinking of how to make money.
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