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I simply do not trust people at their whole value, and expect either betrayal or rejection from them, which is why I only show people particular sides of myself that changes depending on who is seeing me. Some people accuse me of keeping secrets, or not being entirely open about my mind; and the latter is true. I don't tell one single person everything there is to know, because either that person wouldn't benefit from hearing that particular story, or would be lessened by said knowledge. I push down the whole face of my emotions and thoughts and just show the bits needed. Frankly, if I let my thoughts and emotions known at their whole, I'd
A: Hurt people's feelings and lose friendships
B: Be in lonely company because of said thoughts and emotions.
I am an incredibly broken individual, my jadedness is without measure, my disappointment in fellow humans inpalpable. I do my very best to wrestle with that disgust and anger, to keep mute my justified misantrophy because regardless of such a viewpoint, I'd rather enjoy the company of someone who only knows a little bit, than letting someone know my all and be horrified at the absolute horror that is my mind.
