>Be American
>wake up at 7:30AM
>Eat 4 donuts and an entire box of sugar brand sugar cereal for breakfast despite being 25
>shart (or wait until walmart trip later) and shower (every 3 days). '
>Brush teeth with fluoride and lead toothpaste
>get in car that has a $300 a month payment
>drive to wage slave job
>Make sure to drink an entire 2 liter on the 30 minute drive.
>Get to work
>Free donuts and coffee
>4 hours into work, you get a break
>15 minutes? I can make it to McDonalds!
>"Yeah, I'll have 5 big macs, a large fry and a Diet coke and a Salad, I am eating healthy"
>Consume it all in one gasp
>Return to work.
>You are late, Mr. ShekelShoah will doc your pay!
>Time for a 2PM snack
>3 slim jims and 2 cans of Diet Dr. Pepper.
>5PM, quitting time.
>Better stop at the drive through, I don't wanna cook!
>Hi, I'll take 6 Doritos locos tacos, 3 nacho fries and diet pepsi.
>Time to do some shopping.
>Better go to wally world.
>Arrive in parking lot
>Dump all the garbage in the parking lot.
>"Welcome to walmart"
>*SHART
>Cleanup on aisle 10!
>Go to food section
>Fill my cart with delicious snacks
>Hohos, twinkies, frosted flakes, a 48 pack of Diet Dr. Thunder.
>Not a veggie in sight.
>Check out
>Cashier sharts as we both shart in mart.
>Arrive home
>Time for second din din
>Microwave tendies
>The entire pack of tendies
>And a diet coke.
>Have an entire gallon of ice cream for desert.
>Go to bed at 8PM because Dr. Shekelstien says I need to come in early!
