>>55137164I understand what you're saying and I think we are on the same page
I love Kieran a lot, and the autismversing and headcanoning him and building up my protag character for him and coming up with countless daydreams and scenarios for him--most of which likely won't make it to fanfic simply for how many there are--is an extremely personal and frankly involuntary process
I never really "pick" my husbandos, certainly wasn't expecting one from 2023 Pokemon,
I can't help but play with timelines in my head so I don't have just one personal Kieran but a few based on a variety of outcomes and "what if" scenarios with some of them getting pretty dark
There was a time I felt mildly competitive for another character, but I realized quickly just how that could make me miserable and I had bigger problems in life
On the contrary I've watched someone descend into near madness basically halt their life to a standstill engaging in "no doubles" behavior because she always has to maintain this reputation online as "the [husbando] girl" and it's pretty sad
It's an extreme but it can happen to the best of us so I think establishing our own inner worlds and behind happy with them is the most important aspect of having a husbando
Fun is the most important! Let your mind go wild with possibilities!
Like any other insecurity, if we are secure in ourselves we feel less threatened by others
I think your comparison to glass shards is very beautifully put btw
