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If you marry Wemi, you can probably physically abuse her into an acceptable cook, without any repercussions. Burned my pancakes? Stomp her fingies. The sunny side of an fried egg is not running yolk when I poke it? One kick to the stomach. She tries to defend her cooking? Well, pull her by the hair up and down. If she is on her breaking point, pull the deportation card off and then offer her "a carrot" in the form of relaxing your leash and cuddling her, to keep her on an emotional leash.
Just a thought...