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I will never be truly happy I am just stuck in a state of constant hunting for dopamine kicks by watching people who are bubbly and happy and imagining what that would feel like it's pure escapism I wander from stream to stream to make myself forget how empty and loveless my life is and in dead hours like these where there is nowhere to hide and no stream to distract me I lie awake in bed contemplating everything and feeling this creeping sense of dread that reminds me that this all will sooner or later catch up to me and destroy me if it isn't already slowly destroying me
I can't keep doing this I need to change something anons wtf so I do how do I fix something unfixable I've been awake for 27 hours both my body and mind are exhausted I just want to sleep forever
Good morning
