>>52984923This one-shot felt like, for lack of a shorter term, "a series in miniature" rather than a pure one-shot. It's like every timeskip could have been its own chapter in a smut series.
Anyway this entire thing kind of feels like that all throughout due to that feeling so all the moments of 'telling' feel like abrdiging scenes from a non-existent chapter or arc to try and make it all fit into one document.
Honestly, concept wise I feel like if you were going to make this a one-shot you should have started from the homecoming then made the plot about the resparked incest with flashbacks to the past with the big climax being in making one big sex scene with flashbacks rather than this split up approach that doesn't really make a satisfying climax both narratively and erotically.
Also I have to agree with that other anon that this really doesn't feel like either Lore Fubuki or Chuuba Fubuki, and genuinely could have been a Watame or a Suisei fic. You really should have put in more details even if it was surface level or hell done some play involving her tail or ears, anything to make it a Fubuki story rather than just a generic incest fic with not enough chuuba flavor. Like yeah "Auntie's Little Secret" also suffers from this but the little flavor added there keep it working as a fanfic. Here the "Abridged" nature of it kind if means it's trimmed of that flavor and fat that would have made it a good Fubuki fic.
Overall rather mediocre edging on meh one-shot that's a half-decent incest story and a Fubuki In Name Only fanfic. Would probably have made a pretty good series but that ship has sailed.
Now for some minor quibbles... giving the bride a name is probably better than nothing but honestly I feel like she should have gotten something more; usually you can write these taboo smut themese well but due to her being basically non-existent the only thing there at the end is incest rather than cheating. I know this is because of the shorthand way this fic is told but come on.