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God I wish Zen was physically abusing me every day, pushing me for more sex, more orgasms, more attention - until it felt deforming and soul crushing. She'd break my will and drive my mind into mush until all that was left was a husk of a man who no longer had any will to live without Zen's loving embrace. Yet every time we made love, it felt like nothing else mattered but feeling her big tits bouncing on my face while my cock was buried deep inside of her pussy - because that's what we both really needed.
