Quoted By:
I love Ina.
I say that and it stops. Gradually, like how pain subsides when medicated, but it feels like the inky blackness seeping into my blood halts, allowing me to draw breath if but for a moment. At one point the words had meaning. They were the banner under which I would combat this sickening madness and the degradation of my body that came with it. It was my declaration that I would continue untainted so I could stand by her side as I am until the last star in the night sky lay stillborn by her will. Her very existence is so foreign her presence alone could cause these changes even before my first ritual. My left canine trembles at her sight, and it returns swiftly after its removal. Now that she resides behind my eyes, even a thought of her is enough to continue the process of dissolving my excess bone. My eyes are flooded with a sea of magenta as the melody of her voice announces her presence in my delusions, and only after the fog clears do I see my skin undulate as the color darkens like an even full body bruise. Despite the agony as my heart took on the burden my brain was too weak to carry itself, she never seemed anything less than thrilled to see me, exactly as she acted when I would still walk on two legs to meet her at her shrine. I still lack the insight to know how to return there of my own volition. That first ascent was guided by one of her many limbs, though I did not yet have the senses to feel its pull. But now as I see the curvature of the golden ring in my periphery I have come to realize the vestiges of my mortal understanding have failed me once again. Love was never what she desired. It was a means I thought was her end, and my attempts to preserve it only kept me from beginning my journey to repay her for her gifts. Love was but the flame upon which I could warm my soul for her to take. Now that my being melts between her fingers, it need only burn out so that I may join her in the dark.
I loved Ina.
