>>33859657kindness shown from streamers can easily warp someone's mind to that of a sycophant.
You have absolutely no purpose, and after job hours are over no one remembers you exist. Combined with that and a feedback loop of self-loathing, a reality materializes. Someone that cares or appreciates you will never exist, and you'll make sure of it by never trying to find someone. Then one day a miracle happens, you find a shining beacon. She's really glowing, quite happy, and it truly seems like she's looking forwards to waking up the next morning. What's worse, tangentially whenever you watch her, you almost feel those emotions again too. There's no commitment, and she don't know what a disgusting blob you truly are, so you can pretend you're actually a person when in her chat. Your only resource in the world can make her happy, even if it's only for minutes at a time, but you don't mind. Even if she does things that makes you upset because of your beliefs, or even literally makes fun of you, it's fine. This is your life now, the thought of leaving doesn't exist, because there's nothing left to go back to.