>>19229999So, I know I literally can't prove it, but that was me. Yes, All Me. No, I'm not meming.
And I'm sorry for that anon, if I'd known I maybe would've done it differently. But even when she was sliding down, I hope the moments of happiness we had with her can still warm your heart.
The future is an unpredictable mess...but on some level I think I realized that with her a long time ago. It's why I'm still waiting for her, it's why I can see past the pain and the hurt to sharing meaningful days with her again. It won't be the same in a way, but I truly believe that we can salvage a happy future for both ourselves and her if we try. Maybe I'll get proven wrong but if I go down I want to make sure I can say that I kept hope alive in my heart until the very last second.
I might not be helpful to you here. Right now I've bottled up my emotions to try and keep myself stable for her sake. Overdosing on cope, overly optimistic, whatever you want to call it really. I barely flinched after a few hours after the graduation announcement because I was focused on her mental state. But I still scroll past the sad artwork on Twitter and the recommended streams trying not to break that damn inside me just yet. So I don't know if this can resonate at all with you. But even if it's a platitude, I think the idea of washing away the bad times by striving for good days in the future is one of the better ones.
I'm sorry anon. I wish you were there for longer, but maybe in a year or two we can chat about all the new happy memories we'll have gotten to share. I think that'd be nice, at least.