>>59811585I expected this to just be the first half of your contest fic with expanded scenes and fixes to some of the issues raised, this.... isn't that, but I still like it.
Anyway, here's my loosely structed thoughts like last time
I liked the worldbuilding set up here better. Its just structured better, with the musical cut-ins just adding that extra kick; honestly surprised you didn't put up more blue links to music.
Also loved the expanded (pre)incest buildup with the flashback scenes. Though I do have to agree with the other anon, the contest version did the "The First Take" scene better.
In fact the cut-in with the contest prose almost seems like an acknowledgement that this isn't going to be the same kind of story.For lack of a better word, this felt like the second route in a VN where they assume you already know the set up from the first route so they just pop right into the story with the altered set-up.
>That emoticonHow the fuck did Sora become your ex?