Quoted By:
You ever not watch your oshi because you are too nervous to watch? I feel like if I watch her, something will happen, like my heart will beat too fast, so I avoid it. Then it leads me to avoid threads about her because I'm nervous seeing people talk about her. And then I go on long strings of not watching her despite wanting to. My heart yearns for her, but I can't work up the courage to watch her. There is some barrier keeping me from it. Like my heart can't handle her. And the whenever I do work up the courage to watch her, she goes on a break or she starts streaming at times I can't watch.
I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY, WHY DOES SHE MAKE THIS SO HARD FOR ME?
