>>49387099I've been heterosexual my whole life. I've never had a single gay thought. But last month, my work had a promotion available, and for diversity reasons it was only open to LGBT people. I really needed the promotion, so I decided that to earn it I would have to become gay. I tried going to a gay bar and talking to the guys there, but it just didn't make me feel gay. I also tried Grindr, but still no luck. I tried clothes shopping, rollerblading, and even wrestling, but I was still as straight as can be. But then, after considerable thought, I found the solution.
The next morning I walked effeminately into work wearing leather chaps with semen from 6 different men leaking out of my ass. I put my handbag at my desk and went into my boss's office to discuss the promotion. He granted it to me on the spot. As I skipped with joy through the office singing songs from Glee, my coworkers were shocked at my transformation. One asked me: "Anon, how did you become such a huge f-slur so quickly?"
