Quoted By:
Dear gura
What options do I have if my parents are forcing me to get married?
Option 1: give in
Option 2: don’t.
That’s it, really.
They can’t force you. They can pile on a LOT of pressure; they can tell the world you’re getting married; they can arrange a wedding. But they can’t actually force you to go to the wedding or say the vows. You can refuse. There will be a price to be paid - the question is whether you are willing to pay it. If they never speak to you again, is that a price worth paying to not waste your life in a miserable marriage? I would argue yes: if they care so little about your feelings, why should you ruin your life just to maintain a relationship with them?
Don’t beg, plead, bargain, whine, cry or any of that; don’t ask them, TELL them. Tell them you will not marry. Tell your fiance(e) and his / her family first (letter or email might be best). Call the caterers or whatever and tell them you’ve broken your engagement. Send an email to all your friends and family telling them it’s off. Then tell your parents. Yes, there will probably be some yelling. But don’t be bullied.
Then get a job, if you don’t already have one, and MOVE OUT. Pay your own bills and achieve economic independence from your parents; that’s the only way to end their power over you. (I don’t know what stage the whole wedding-planning thing is at; if they haven’t actually fixed a date and arranged the ceremony yet, it might be best to find a job and move before you confront them - get the job and move first. Don’t tell them what you’re planning, just do it).
Option 1: behave like an adult and take responsibility for your own life and your own choices.
Option 2: don’t, and spend your life regretting it.
Your choice.
One day your parents will be dead and you will be alive. What sort of life do you want to have then? Think about that.
