>>62207607>I thought most of the parasocials would cling to her in every way. you seem different already.I'm "different" but not. I'm like someone who has already had their liver destroyed by alcoholism and who was lucky enough to get at transplant. I'm someone who knows what the dangers are but is still drinking a pint of lager at the bar because I'm there to socialize. It looks healthy, but it's dangerous considering my history. I shouldn't be drinking a drop.
>>62207884I mean I know how to break into those kinds of fan communities. You kinda have to "bribe" them with your talents or something you're good at. You can't just exist and expect people to like you, at least not in a way that respects your individuality (in which case, why wouldn't you just hang out here instead?)
In fact the less you say while the more you contribute, the better. Doesn't matter what it is as long as you're decent and you put in enough effort.
I thought fanfiction could be that for me because I used to be a decent writer, but it's too low effort/barrier for entry while being too difficult for other fans to read all of it.
Also Shiori already clearly has some of her favorites at this point, and that's not gonna change without the relationship to her fans in general changing. There's already several novel's worth of writing by fans. I thought if I read other people's stories I might be able to be more engaged, but I realized that my credibility is low given how little fan fiction I've put out and I'm afraid of "polluting" my ideas with the ideas of other fans. This is why I actually hate likes because it causes me to put too much thought into what I think Shiori might like, but at the same time without some sort of outside feedback I'm just kinda (metaphorically) jerking off over Shiori. Pride and wanting to be focused on the community is keeping me from seeking out a real creative writing workshop, I feel like I've "suffered" enough to write from the heart but it's just not coming anymore. I'm spent only after a little bit.
Fan art is better but there's also a lot of that as well and you have to be very good at it before you show anything off.
I might finally be graduating from vtubers and Shiori. I hate that I'm doing this because I know as soon as I look away something cool is gonna happen and I'm gonna miss it due to not being invested in the right way. Oh well.
