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tldr, just realized i've been living in an abusive family after my partner pointed it out to me. still struggling to accept the fact. i wish i could glitch away and de-exist myself, if that's a thing. i hate knowing the truth, i hate the fact that they did things that i'll never be able to let go, i hate that i'm basically conditioned in such a way to feel guilt and expect nothing but horrible things in this world.
i don't fit anywhere, i don't even know why the fuck i'm still living. i used my partner to get out from this horrible reality i live in and it's all my fault. i'm not a fucking good person and....it's best that i just go and die, right anons? at least by that way i won't be a burden to them or anyone else in this world.