>>7591820Thanks for the perspective anon. I like what you said and I'll think about all of it.
>What exactly did he say that was envious/glass-half-full?He (I'll call him Casey) made a few jokes about how much he hates another old friend of ours (I'll call him Tony) because Tony's life seems so perfect with a great job and fiance. I know they were jokes and Casey doesn't really hate Tony but it felt like the envy was genuine. So I pushed back a little bit and mentioned that even though Tony's life looks perfect he surely has a lot of problems going on in his life as well, just less visible.
I wanted to impart on Casey that he he should be gratefule and appreciative with the things he has in his life now instead of comparing his life with Tony's, because really you can always keep comparing right? But what got me down was after Casey admitted he's aware Tony has his own problems (which I felt was sincere admission) he said he'd much rather have Tony's problems than his own, because it sounded like he missed my point! Or maybe I didn't explain it well enough but still I was sad to hear that. He made a few other similar comments but that one stood out the most. I get where Casey's coming from but I wish he could be more grateful for all the things he has instead of making so many comparisons.
I want to help him but I know I can't force people to be who I want them to be even if I think it's for their own good. I also haven't had friends in a long time (years) so I don't know what kind of boundaries I want to set. I don't like the envious part of Casey though I know that's not all of him and like you said everyone is going to have flaws and issues. I just have so little social experience I don't know how much I want to tolerate.
