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i'm scared to try and make friends but i know i have to try because i want friends
and if i don't try i won't make any.
it might be hard but even if i fail i have to keep trying because i know that if i give up then nothing will change.
if i give up i have no chance.
if i try i have a chance even though it could hurt.
i keep saying i'll try later but later never ends. i have to try. i need to try.
i'm letting my life be controlled by fear and i want it to stop. maybe for now i can't stop the fear but i can still do things despite it.
the truth is i'm so fucking scared