>>7752518Congrats. You've hit Absurdism, and joined Sisyphus in his contemplation of the boulder. Most people never think that far out; a lot of those who do, find solipsism and get sucked down into that hole.
Absurdism is a nice place. You'll find a certain... clarity here, if that makes sense. My recommendation to you is this: don't get hung up, because, oh, God, is it easy to. Absurdism reveals the truth of the world to us--that it is a thick, entangled web of people, ideas, and emotions, and that it's all come about in less than an eyeblink on a cosmic scale.
There is horror, in that, to contemplate that everyday human life is miniscule and meaningless, on that same cosmic scale b but there is also a freedom there, to be relieved of what burdens may seem immense and unholy, to trade them for the peace of knowing you are but an infinitely small fraction of the Absurd.
The lovely thing is, Absurdism has a beautiful mating surface with existentialism. That loss of meaning, that ego death of the human race--it leaves a void, doesn't it? Everything you've ever seen, everything you've ever done, and everyone you've ever known, will all be stardust one day. The sun was burning before we showed up to this party, and it will burn long after we tap out...but that's okay.
It's your job to fill that void, now. You get to decide what holds meaning to you, and what doesn't. The people in your life? Your job? For me, it was my cat, for a while; for my best friend, it was archery. That was all that tethered the two of us to this ball of rock. Nowadays, it's a good night's sleep and a good morning's whiskey. All that to say: Figure out what has meaning to you, and cling to it. Find what makes Sisyphus happy. In doing so, you will overthrow the gods and derive meaning from whence there is none to be found.