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Anon, this isn't what you want. I spent almost two years in high school with gender dysphoria, only to at some point come to the realization that I didn't want to be a girl for the sake of being a girl. Rather, I wanted to be a girl for the idea that it was going to be the answer to a lot of questions I had about my life, regarding my future, my sexuality, my beliefs, and a number of other things.
To be trans is a lot of work, and I'll admit part of me is very thankful I somehow stopped having dysphoria. The other part is the anxiety-riddled side that thinks everything needs to change or everything will get worse.
The worst part is, from my experience, even if you were to go through with all of this, she most likely won't say yes.
Stay strong.