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I've been trying to "grow up" by getting a house with my gf, got a new puppy, new big boy job, and bought a new truck. I felt like I was doing the right things, being a good person, but my opportunities were passing me by. I wanted to dump her, move out, sell my car, move states away, and go back to school. I wanted an escape to live a different life. As if I was being an inauthentic version of myself.
Then I just realized that all is as the Force wills it, so I changed my pape and leaned to appreciate what I have.