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I'm sorry anon. I know how you feel.
I lost my grandmother and a few years after lost my grandfather. They were the people that helped me and my mother help us from becoming homeless (my father kicked us out).
I took care of them to the best of my abilities while my mother worked. I even got kicked out of college since I stopped going. I sacrificed everything for the two people I loved.
Remember your grandfather as someone who wants the best for you, he wants you to strive and be always a better person every day. Remember that and make it the flame that'll keep you going. Take care anon and good luck. I truly hope he is able to get better.
