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Oldfag. Anxiety and compulsion disorders that've been unresponsive to medication. Been alone and broken close to a decade now and my life is literally without hope of change, barring some luck with yet another med.
That said, a lot of people in this thread seem to be in a bad place. If you want some advice from someone too young to give it, try not to aim for joy. Aim for contentment. I have nothing to look forward to, nothing to hope for, no one to watch the world with. But I've learned to be content with what I do have.
It's not much, but it might be enough for now. And who knows? It might get better.