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>be me yesterday
>about ready to graduate
>can't handle stress
>blow off class to explore the forests
>bring fomantis because I don't want to die
>let her wander around the forest as long as she stays nearby
>hear chirps and pecking all around me
>itsabeautifuldayoutside.duskull
>look up
>every fucking trumbeak in a 3 mile radius has surrounded me
>grab fomantis
>NIGERUNDAYOO.SMOKEY
>these birds are actually chasing me
>they steal my hat
>it was my favorite hat, too. Really cool blue and yellow
>leave it behind, I'll get it later if its still there
>suddenly blind
>bright light in my face brings me out of autopilot
>trip on a root
>fuck
>yepthatsme.kuzco
>hear a bunch of squaks and shrieks from the birds
>sounds like they're fighting over who gets to eat my fomantis
>don't wanna see my partner getting shredded
>stay face down in the dirt and grass
>at least the ground is soft and cool on my scrapes and bruises
>noises stop
>something starts rapidly jabbing my side
>look up
>BigHairyAndPink.mp4
>giant bug
>it must've fought off the birds for first dibs on my corpse
>it keeps poking me
>doesn't look too intimidating actually
>smells like flowers too
>pull myself up
>look for my fomantis
>call out to it
>no response, but the giant bug pokes me
>call again
>poke
>wait
>finally get over post concussion autism and put 2+2 together
>fomantis must've evolved while I was running
>relief.exhale
>my ankle hurts like a bitch from the root, legs and arms bleeding
>figure I can walk back
>try to remember what fomantis' evolution was called
>guess it doesn't matter
>get back to school
>pass out in nurse's office
>be me today
>wake up
>pic related sitting on top of me
>still don't know what the fuck its called
>note from professor next to me
>i have to present to class about my fomantis' evolution
>still don't know what its called
am I a retard bros? What the fuck is this thing?
