>>57402172I’m the director of operations in a major company in Kansas City. I make six figures a year, and I am very comfortable. One thing that has always eluded me though is romance, as I had a very traumatic experience when I was a teenager that led me to question anyone that got too close. Come to think, I may have sublimated that loneliness into focusing on my studies back then and my career now.
It’s hard to get to know women because they always think dating is some sort of game. Whenever I build up the courage to get to know someone, they put on a mask and say what you want to hear. Or they wouldn’t accept me fully when I become honest. I think about this a lot but I realized you have to put a lid on your deepest insecurities and fears, hide away your true self if you want to get along with others.
Shiori made me feel something I’ve never felt in a long time. And to be honest, it may just be a persona she adopted, or it may just be me pushing my expectations on another again, but she really speaks to me. And it hurts knowing that no matter how much I support her or how much I give to her, that I will always just be a name on her chatlog. Nothing beyond that. No private book readings with the two of us. No doing chores we’ve split between us around the house. No hapoy conversations in front of a warm meal. I will never hold her in my arms as I talk about my deepest, darkest insecurities and have her tell me it’s okay.
I’m successful but I would take a life of moldiness and bugs if I could be with Shiori. I would shred and bargain every second of my remaining life and live out three last months if it meant I could live those few moments with Shiori.
