I saw lots of people gushing over Rowlet-anon's intro back when it was posted, so I gave it a look.
>https://rentry.org/CiderEntry001It's a very good story! Great job conveying Cider's personality and emotions. The way you introduce him as a naive but enthusiastic guy who gets unfairly beaten down is a good technique for making the audience care about the protagonist. The beach scene was particularly well written, with nice details and a cool idea for symbolism with the bubbles. The epistolary style makes for an interesting read, with the way the narration sounds so casual and even stream-of-conscious at times, and the way there's no dialogue aside from a few scattered quotes. I think you did a nice job writing within that style. Also, the depiction of the guild is amusing, and the art is an enjoyable addition. I like your art style.
I can't really think of any major critiques. There are some typos and mistakes scattered around, and maybe some parts where pacing could've been slightly improved or a bit more description could've been added, but it doesn't really take away from the quality. The story is quite polished and enjoyable to read. Nice work.
