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Guys, I found a leaked transcript of the Gurame podcast!
>Gura: Knock knock.
>Ame: Who's there?
>Gura: It's the police, ma'am. Your oshi's been hit by a drunk driver. She's dead!
>Kiara: Oh no, no, no! No, you cannot joke about that!
>Ame: Yeah, that's not funny, Gura. That's not the kind of humor we do on this show.
>Gura: Okay... Yeah, you know what? I-I’m sor-I'm sorry. I know. It's just, you know, it's been a rough few weeks, Ame. Ever since I...killed that rigger guy.
>Ame: Okay, I'm waiting for the punchline.
>Gura: There is no punchline. It's not a joke.
>Ame: You're serious, aren't you? You're telling us you killed that young rigger on the subway?
>Gura: Mm-hmm.
>Ame: And...why should we believe you?
>Gura: I’ve got nothing left to lose. Nothing can hurt me anymore. My life is nothing but a comedy.
>Ame: So let me get this straight. You think that killing that rigger is funny?
>Gura: I do. And I'm tired of pretending it's not. Comedy is subjective, Ame. Isn't that what they say? All of you, the system that knows so much, you decide what's right or wrong. The same way that you decide what's funny or not!
>Bubba: Get her off!
>Ame: O-Okay, I-I think...I-I might understand it. You...did this to start a movement? To become a-a symbol?
>Gura: C'mon, A-me. Do I look like the kind of shark that could start a movement? I killed that rigger because they were awful. Everybody is awful these days. It's enough to make anyone crazy.
>Ame: Alright. So that's it then, you're crazy. That's your defense for killing a rigger?
>Gura: No. They couldn't carry a tune to save their lives. [Bubba barks disapprovingly] Ugh, why is everybody so upset about this rigger? If it was me dying on the sidewalk, you'd walk right over me! I pass you every day, and you don't notice me! But this rigger... What, because Yagoo went and cried about them on TV?!
>Ame: You have a problem with Yagoo?
>Gura: Yes, I do! Have you seen what it's like out there, A-me? Do you ever actually leave the studio? Everybody just yells, shouts, and screams at each other. Nobody’s civil anymore! Nobody thinks what it's like to be the other guy. You think men like Yagoo ever think what it's like to be someone like me?! To be somebody but themselves?! They don't. They think we'll all just sit there and take it like good little girls! That we won't werewolf and go wild!!
>Ame: You finished? I mean, there’s so much self-pity, Gura. You sound like you're making excuses for killing that young rigger. Not everybody, and I'll tell you this, not everyone is awful.
>Gura: You're awful, Ame.
>Ame: Me? I'm awful? Oh, yeah, how am I awful?
>Gura: Playing my video. Inviting me on the show. You just wanted to make fun of me. You're just like the rest of 'em.
>Ame: You don't know the first thing about me, pal. Look what happened because of what you did. What it led to. There are riots out there. Two policemen are in critical condition.....and you're laughing. You're laughing. Someone was killed today because of what you did.
>Gura: I know. How about another joke, A-me?
>Ame: No, I think we’ve had enough of your jokes.
>Gura: What do you get...
>Ame: I don't think so.
>Gura: ...When you cross...
>Ame: I think we're done with your jokes, that's it.
>Gura: ...A chronically depressed streamer with a company that abandons her and treats her like trash?!
>Ame: Call the police, Enma!
>Gura: I'll tell you what you get!
>Ame: Call the police!
>Gura: YOU GET WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE!!!
