>>8084659Thanks Anon.
It's been almost 3 months now. Not really any better yet. It's hard to tell what is from her being inexperienced, facing a life of cancer at 25, or just plain trying to comfort herself however she can. I know that she is a good person and means well but, I really can't tell if she got scared of the commitment or just plain really doesn't see me as someone she spend the rest of her life with. Her reason for that was pretty lame IMO so hard to tell if she is just stupid or making it up.
I made her cry this week. Was chatting with a friend and she happened to be near by and stealing looks at me. I decided fuck it, I will still be seeing her around unless I move away so might as well at least try some small talk to be polite IDFK. Made it about 10 seconds into hi, how you doing, hope the rest of your treatment went well...etc., and she started crying saying it was too much. So I walked off.
Got a text later saying essentially: sorry for being emotional, I'm glad you said hi. I miss you and its easy for all the emotion to flood back when I see you. I miss what we shared and the connection we had. wanted you to know that its not that I don't want to see you and talk but talking and not being able to go back to our old ways was overwhelming.
So at least she probably gets that she fucked up cutting me loose. I left it at that and haven't responded. At best I would be sending a thumbs up emoji and at worst I want to tell her, "yeah you dumped me. what the fuck do you think would happen? we would just be friends like nothing happened?
Trying not to think of her, but got ghosted on 2 dates and had a heifer show up to another. Also went to a family wedding and that was tough seeing people get to do what I had been dreaming about.
